The FloodingReaching behind and dipping backwardsInto days when I knew better.Leaning backwards and falling behindTo see fate drift ever forward.Retracing my steps and walking awayTo find the secret to my smile.Searching blind and struggling to learnWhatever I did to die this way.Lacking faith and losing hopeIn the joy that is, Was, Will always be…The floodingof my feelings.
Leave Me Alone - CommentaryLeave Me Alone was a piece that I had been intending to write, and had been working towards, since the end of my first University year. I had been keeping regular journal entries on both my Internet journal (1) and my personal writer's journals with the thought that at the end of my studies, I would write memoirs of these three years spent as a student in Luton. After studying autobiography in the first semester of my final year, I felt drawn to the genre and decided that I would write my memoirs for this special project assignment. Rejecting an earlier idea of mine for a poetry anthology after a 'crisis of faith' in my poetic skills, I decided that a recollection of my University years would be an appropriate follow-up to Drowning in Longsands (2), a text that remembers my years in Sixth Form College, written in the aforementioned first semester of the year.The initial difficulties that arose were allowing myself to be influenced by the works of other writers. Stubbornl
Blinded by a dreamI was swimming.I could not feel the sting of my eyes as I jumped in, nor the sudden chill of the water, but the water was so visible, with sparkles dancing on the waves above my head as a gift from the beautiful sun. I smiled a toothy grin and as I did, bubbles escaped from my mouth and shot upwards to kiss the air that gave them release. I wanted to be released from the water too and, with a kick of my legs, I sprang to the surface and stroked towards the side of the pool, gasping for breath. I saw people applaud my technique and as soon as I had it in me, I dived back under, hearing the swish of the water as I moved my limbs about, going as deep as possible. The deeper I got, the darker the world around me became. Suddenly, I was flailing around wildly, relying on my touch to tell me where to go! Then, someone wrapped their arms around me and lifted me out of the water.It was only a dream and it ended when I reached the bottom.